January 27th, 2010
Lately I’ve been in an almost constant state of pouty anger. I blame it on being tired. I’ve been extremely tired these last two weeks, and being tired makes it harder to cope with my classes this semester. I’m having a really hard time in most of them — not academically, just with the teacher or the students in my groups. Yesterday, I … I was pretty much angry all day long, about different things. I’m not usually an angry person, in fact, I very rarely get truly angry.
So, I’ve decided that I’m going to prescribe myself some therapy.
Prescription #1: Get more sleep. (Maybe if I slept through my classes I would solve two problems at once; I would be getting more sleep, and I wouldn’t have to deal with people. I’d just fail. )
Prescription #2: Laugh it off. I’m usually really good at this, so I just need to go back to finding humor in everything.
TANGENT: We passed a billboard the other day that said, “Concussed kids take longer to heal.” I couldn’t stop laughing. I think “concussed” is the funniest word ever. Matt thought I was crazy.
Prescription #3: Listen to happy music. I don’t listen to music hardly at all, which is kind of pathetic since I have a fancy iPod (it has so many other things, I forget that it plays music).
Prescription #4: Make these waffles:
I refuse to allow myself to get any closer to motherhood domesticity without being able to make the perfect waffle. I have finally mastered eggs, pancakes, and chocolate chip cookies well enough that I can be a good mother, but the waffle has been hard to conquer.
January 15th, 2010
Should I do more homework or read a book?
I’ve been a very dedicated student for the first two weeks of the new semester. I went to all of my classes on time (with the exception of the one that I couldn’t find because I was in the wrong building, but that only happened once), I did the homework EARLY, I did more than I was required and expected to do, I made comments in class, I was nice to all the other kids (it’s really hard sometimes). I’ve been a very good student.
End of bragging.
Matt had to go to meetings because he’s important. I’m wearing his giant slippers.
Here I sit, faced with a dilemma: Should I do more homework or read the new book that’s been sitting on Matt’s desk for a week, making me crazy with curiosity and the thirst for the written word? (Yeah, that was a wee dramatic.)
See, the issue is my homework is reading. Reading, reading, and when I think I’m done, more reading. If I’m going to be spending my time reading, shouldn’t I spend it reading the homework for one of my classes? Learning something about autocratic power, American realism, dangerous trips to Antarctica, or ethnic stratification of a specific sub-population?
Oh, who am I kidding? We all knew I was going to choose the book.
January 11th, 2010
I remember thinking that adults had it together. Boy was I getting the wool pulled over my eyes. The deeper into adulthood I plunge, the more evident it becomes that adults have very little figured out.
Other things I thought when I was younger:
- For an embarrassing amount of my youth I was saying, “duck, duck, moose.”
- My much smarter and older sister told me that macaroni and cheese was seafood. I believed her until my sixth grade science class set me straight. With their laughter.
- When I was five, I would stare longingly at a certain car dealership in the small Montana town we lived in, I thought it was Disneyland (this I also blame on my older sister). It had everything I knew about Disneyland: lots of cars, balloons, and people milling around inside. I was very disappointed when my mother told me that Disneyland was in California, a place very far away from Montana.
- I thought that car windshields had special sensors on them that made the wipers wipe when there was too much rain to see through. I would stare at the wipers from my seat in the back, in awe of how they always wiped at just the right time. Again, I was later disappointed.
- My mother was diagnosed with cancer when I was very young. No one could explain to my sister and me what had made her so sick, so we came up with a few things we thought might cause cancer, and avoided them. Things like light-up shoes and answering machine beeps.
January 8th, 2010
While we were in Houston, I went shopping with my mother-in-law and sister-in-law at a local craft store. The following caught my attention and disturbed me greatly.
I was just walking by this display, and the part that caught my attention was the giant blue “Make a baby!” that happened to be at my eye level.
As I examined this…thing, the part that disturbed me the most was the caption:
The caption under “Preemie Starter Kit Course #2″ says, “All the fun of a real baby without the mess!”
Does anyone else find this more than a little disturbing?
I found these pictures on my phone, and I thought I would spread the disturbia.
January 8th, 2010
Don’t worry, I don’t suffer from low self-esteem (actually, I think it’s quite the opposite), I just think being honest is healthy. Honestly, sometimes I’m a moron.
A few of the moronic things I’ve done recently:
- While driving on Tuesday or Wednesday, I counted 4 u-turns that I had to make enroute to a destination mere blocks from our apartment. I’m not sure why I still haven’t figured out this navigation thing.
- I knew that I had a class in Clarke 329. I looked for room 329 for half an hour, making me very late to the class that was supposed to be in the room. I finally called Matt and during the conversation realized that I was in the Smith Building, not the Clarke. (There is no room 329 in the Smith, in case you go looking for it too.)
- Before taking Matt to his early meetings Sunday, I thought I would head out to the car early to try and get it warmed up and defrosted while he was still getting ready. I went out to the car, unlocked the car, locked it again and tried to open the doors. When Matt came to the car he found me very frustratedly trying to open the locked doors to our car. Like I said, sometimes, I’m a moron.
UPDATE: Shortly after writing this post, I heard a phone ring with the same ringtone that I have on my phone. I looked around (I was in the library), eagerly waiting for the person to answer so I could see who had the same ringtone as I do. I waited and waited and the phone just kept ringing. I finally got annoyed with this person for letting their phone ring so long in the library. It was my phone. Silly, silly me.
January 4th, 2010
Something miraculous must have happened during the night, because today Jonah seems to be doing much better. I changed his water once more last night before we went to bed, and today Jonah is swimming around and blowing bubbles. He even has a little bit of his color back! He’s not as energetic as usual, but maybe with time.
Jonah went back to most of his old ways: getting mad at anything pink or white, proudly showing off his bubbles when I walk by, rolling his uneaten food into a ball and pushing it to the side, ramming his head into the side of his bowl.
It’s possible that I was too quick to wish him luck in his fishy afterlife, he’s decided to stick around a little longer.
January 3rd, 2010
We left Jonah in chilly Rexburg while we enjoyed a humid Texan Christmas. We were sure to leave him with a slowly dissolving fish tablet before we left (it was supposed to feed him while we were away), and wrap a towel around his bowl.
He didn’t have a very merry Christmas. We came home to a pale pink fish instead of a vibrant red. He was pretty comatose and groggy (for a fish), and not himself at all. Fish have personalities too, and apparently his dissolved with the food.
We changed his water and gave him some special blue water (not toilet water, I promise). It seemed to perk him up a lot. After a couple of days it seemed that he had his old spark back.
When we came back from an outing tonight, he was practically motionless in his water. After a few unsuccessful attempts to liven him up, Matt finally poked Jonah with his finger to see if he was still alive. He was (I let out an inexplicable scream when Jonah squirmed). He’s not even just a pale pink, he’s now yellow and white along his belly.
I don’t think he’s going to make it through the night. He’s downright lethargic. He wouldn’t even get mad at my wagging finger.
I miss the days when he blew me mating bubbles.
I’m going to go say my goodbyes, just in case this really is the end.
(PS: We’ve already done some preliminary name brainstorming for Jonah 2.0, if it comes to that.)